Wow - where do I start?
I’m just like you in so many ways.
When I was a teenager, I weighed 125, and just knew that I was at a good weight. Fast forward to 20 - I now weighed 135. I was still pretty comfortable with my weight. I had weighed 125 for about 6 years… so I was pretty sure that I’d stay close to 135 for a good long time.
Over the next year or two, as I noticed myself gaining weight, it didn’t concern me. I knew that I’d be fine - something inside of me just knew that I would always weigh between 135 and 145… I knew I’d NEVER hit 150.
So when I was 23, and weighed 149, I was worried. I was getting dangerously close to 150. So I did the Atkins method - you know, where you eat meat and cheese and eggs and as much protein as you can… and you ditch the carbs. I was miserable - I’ve always been a bread lover - and I only lasted a couple of months. I did lose about 8 pounds, and I felt pretty good about that.
But surprise, surprise - I gained it all back within a couple of weeks. By a year later, I weighed 156. I felt out of control. I had crossed a weight line that I never ever thought I would cross, and I didn’t know what to do about it. So I started a weight loss group at my church using a system called “Prism Weight Loss System”.
It was catered to Christians and was a fairly restrictive calorie counting plan. No sugar, no fried food, no white flour, no cheating.
I did that for about a year, and I experienced quite a lot of emotional growth during that time. It’s amazing how much control food had over me. I lost nearly 20 pounds and felt great!
So what was the problem? Again, I couldn’t maintain the restrctions. I began eating a little bit of white rolls here and there, a little sugar here and there… and before I knew it I was eating all the same old food I had always eaten.
I quickly gained weight, and when I hit the 150s again, I enrolled in the Metabolic Research Diet program. This program was designed to target increasing your metabolism by eating combinations of foods at separate times of the day. I did this for a couple of months - lost a little weight - and derailed at Christmas time.
I played around a little bit with the My Body Makeover plan, the 5 Factor Diet, and other plans like that. By this time, I knew that if it was too hard for me to follow, I just wouldn’t stick with it long-term… so I didn’t bother sticking with any of them for longer than a week.
Then, in 2006, I realized I absolutely had to do something about my weight. I had gotten up to the 160s. I’d moved initially from the very ideal 120s to the comfortable 130s; from the comfortable 130s to the concerned 140s; from the concerned 140s to the “never thought I’d be here” 150s; and then from the 150s to the alarming 160s.
When I got up to 168, I walked into Weight Watchers and signed up. I followed the program with zeal and commitment for 6 months, and lost nearly 20 pounds. I was excited and felt successful… and then the holidays hit. I enjoyed them with a little restraint, but somehow after eating all of that good food just didn’t have it in me to begin counting points and restraining myself again.
So in 2007, I gained all of my weight back. By summer I weighed more than I had the year before, when I joined Weight Watchers.
Early in 2008 I weighed myself and discovered that I had breezed through the 170s and was sitting at 181. 181!!! That’s when I lost hope. I did. For several months I began to just assume I’d be large… that I’d get diabetes in a few years, just like my dad did… that I’d have heart disease just like him… and that I would just have to be okay with that, because “obviously I can’t lose weight and keep it off.”
And then, one day, I stopped wallowing. I “woke up” so to speak, and began looking for ways to lose weight that would work with my lifestyle. I knew I had to find something that I could stick to for the rest of my life, so it couldn’t be too restrictive…but if you don’t restrict sugary or fatty foods, surely you won’t lose weight, right?
Since then I’ve been delving into all kinds of weight loss resources, learning about them… finding out what keeps people on track, and what doesn’t work at all. I’m learning how to keep weight off PERMANENTLY… and get off of this diet roller coaster trap.
I’m excited about sharing my knowledge with other women like me - life is for living, and I want to live it strong, lean, healthy, and full of energy!
Bethany